Am I alone??

My oldest starts kindergarten in September. To say I have mixed emotions is a understatement. I love his zest for learning. I want him to grow. I want him to make all kinds of friends. But I have to say, the thought of me not being with him every minute is breaking my heart. I have always had homeschooling in the back of my mind. But I know me, I know it isn't a possibility. I believe now that I have ADHD and I know I am not structured enough to do it. Beside the fact that my husband is 100% against it.

So many parents I talk to say they can't wait for their kids to start school. Am I too attached? Will this get better, easier?

I will miss our days at the beach, mornings in the woods. I will miss this

Things I love Thursday!

Focusing on the positive!

What I am loving this week

* Thunderstorms - one rolling in as I type

* My sons love of learning. They want to know about everything. Makes my heart shine

* The end of the week long rain coming soon!!!!

* The Nook app on my new iPad. I have been reading so much again. So happy. Any book recommendations?

* Coffee (nothing new <3)

What are you loving?

Does it really take a village?

Within the past year I have had huge change in my life. Not good change, lots of adjustments in our life, lots of tears. Without really getting into much detail, I have had a lot of family "conflict" that has resulted in my family becoming my boys and my husband and my dad. I am from a huge family that has always been close so this is a big, big change for me. Heartbreaking actually. But time has passed and it is becoming our normal.
So that being said, I always have that in my mind...does it really take a village to raise children? I use to think so. I go to my son's schools and I see the aunts and grandmothers bringing and picking the kids up. Grandparents in the food store with their grandchildren. It makes me wonder does every mom have someone?
But I am doing this. I am with my kids all day, every day. My husband works long hours. When he is home he is so good taking them out but I think I feel sad more for my kids. They don't have that big family that I grew up with.
Do you have a support system or do you go it alone?

Ugh

Hi all. I'm recovering from awful Tuesday I'll be back tonight with a real post!


- Posted using BlogPress from my iPad

Sunday's Best

Not the greatest photo but I stalked this bird for hours today!!

Grateful

Sorry for my little absense. You know, sometimes life gets in the way. We are heading into a week of rain. Makes for some lonnnng days with 2 boys. Anyway, we had a great weekend, feeling very grateful.

I am grateful for....

A husband who works hard so I can stay home with my boys to watch them grow, help them discover, teach them and love them.

The little spot in our yard that will soon be a patio for us to enjoy this summer. Many meals. Many good times.

Herbs that need to be planted.

A few GREAT friends. Because really, thats all you need!!

What are you grateful for today?

Why I love where I live

This is one of the many reasons I love my town. Just blocks from my home. Still can take my breath away!

What I have learned the past week.

I really don't have 500 friends?!? Last week, after much thought I decided to take a Facebook break. Some family tension was the main reason but I was growing weary of the negativity and political bickering back and forth. I was sure after 24 hours I would be back. But instead of feeling like I was missing out on something, I am feeling so much lighter, so much happier. Interestingly enough, of all those friends I have on Facebook, ya know, my best friend from 2nd grade, the girl I sat next to in 10th grade science, My cousin's cousin...yeah all of those "friends"! Well, anyway, out of all of those people I have only heard from maybe 10 of them since then.

I recently referred to this as "fake friendship" It's easy for them to leave a comment or "like" a photo but the ones that really matter are the ones that pick up the phone to check on you.

Will I go back to Facebook? Oh, Im sure I will. Im just happy I did this. It really put things in perspective for me and now I know how many "friends" I have and I am quite happy about it.

My Sunday Best Week 2

AMAZING Day!

I had the greatest Mother's Day Weekend! I said to my husband I wanted two things for Mother's Day. A iPad (i dont ask for much..haha) and to capture a bird of prey with my camera! Both were impossible on Friday...well guess not! I love my iPad and take a look at this...

Not just 1 but 2!!! It may sound crazy how excited I am about this but it made me sooo happy!

I had such a great time with hubby and my boys. Just being outside all weekend was so great and we have 4 days coming up of beautiful weather! How was your Mama's day?

iPad (or happy mother's day to me!)

First post from my new shiny iPad! What is everyones favorite apps?

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPad

{this moment}

{this moment} A Friday ritual. A single photo. no words. capturing a moment from the week.

A simple, special, extraordinary moment. A moment I want to pause, savor and remember

If your inspired to do the same, leave a link of your "moment" in the comments for all to find and see.

taken from http://www.soulemama.com/

Things I love Thursday!!!

Focus on the positive will be my mantra tonight....so a list my friends....

WHAT I AM LOVIN'

• 
  
  
  Mother's Day tea at my son's school today. How fun it was



• 
  
  
  Spring! After this winter...enough said!



• 
  
  
  Tacos for dinner Happy Cinco de Mayo!!



• 
  
  
  a few friends I can trust



• 
  
  
  Some "me" time this weekend



• 
  
  
  My sons' unconditional love



• 
  
  
  My sleeping pup next to me

What are you lovin' today??

In a funk...

It happens every year, the week before Mother's Day. This year its many things pulling me down. I lost my mom in 2000. The year My husband and I started trying to have a baby. The next 5 years, dealing with fertility problems and not having my mom were so hard. I wasn't a mom and didnt have a mom. I HATED that day! Then I had my boys. 2 within a year! Now my boys dont know my mom and im sad about it. Don't get me wrong. I love celebrating being a mom because I LOVE being a mom. I just miss her. Alot! She is with me always, I just wish we had her with us.
Tomorrow I am going to my son's school for a Mother's Day tea. He is so excited. I am so excited. I dont get much time with just him so I am really looking forward to it.

Remembering....

Today has brought back so many memories. Memories of a beautiful, sunny September day almost 10 years ago. Last night we brought the kids to one of the playgrounds here in town. At the park is a memorial for victims of September 11th. My county lost the most people in the World Trade of all of NJ. Traces of smoke came across the bay into our bedroom windows in the days following the tragedy. It was so ironic we picked that park last night, just hours before our President announced that the mastermind behind those attacks had been killed.

The victims have been on my mind all day. I hope the families get some peace from this.